"'Bestie', 'bestie',
'bestie'. That's how pant will shift
and you will not know ". Uluoma said to her sister, Nina.
The latter smiled, fiddling with her phone. It was apparent the smile wasn't
for Uluoma but for the 'bestie' in question.
"Am I not talking to you,
Nina?"
Another smile. The chat was really intriguing. Anger got the better part of
Uluoma and she made to snatch Nina's cellphone.
Another grumble, this time unintelligible.
"You're still chatting with that
boy? Tell me, is he your boyfriend?"
"Sis 'Luoma, he's not. How many times will I tell you? He's just my
friend. It just happens that our friendship is the best of its kind."
"Best of its kind? Okay. Keep up the
friendship o. See the way he makes you smile."
"Sister 'Luoma, just say you're
jealous." Nina retorted, turning her face sideways in a scowl.
"Jealous kwa! Of what? Teenagers who
are obviously in love but have decided to friendzone each other?"
"Sister, we're not in love. I mean,
we’re just friends. It is friendship, sister, not relationship". Nina
almost yelled, stressing the syllables of each word.
Uluoma shook her head in amusement and said nothing again. She knew it was
possible that the only thing between her sister and the supposed guy was
friendship but she still couldn't believe that. She knew she had a skewed view
about keeping best friends of the opposite sex. Why wouldn't she, after her
experience with David?
David, she began narrating to her sister, used to be her best friend, confidant
and teacher but they both refused to admit that they were lovers even when it
was crystal clear to others. They walked, ate, read together and were always
seen together. Irrespective of this, Uluoma would say to anyone who bothered
about them that they were just best friends who couldn't do without each other
and besides, he never asked her out.
He never did ask her out but they smooched each time they were behind
closed doors. He was the one who introduced her to her favourite drink, 33
Export Lager beer and they both were wont to drink it in times of celebration.
The first time she went clubbing was with David, there and then he taught her
how to take alcohol just as how he taught her difficult physics and chemistry
practicals. Everyone thought they were dating. They were but denied it. They walked
under the umbrella of 'friendship' and irrespective of all these 'initial gragra', as a typical Nigerian
would say, they eventually parted ways.
The day David made love to her was like every other day. Exams were over and
every student was planning on returning to their various homes. Uluoma and
David were together, getting all lovey-dovey under the moonlight, sipping from
their favourite drink, 33 Export Larger beer. He would be travelling to Abuja
the following day and it would take about four months before they saw each
other again. This was a derring-do to them as they were inured to seeing each
other six days a week. Uluoma couldn't help but cry. She was sure going to miss
him.
David soothed her with his words, wiping the tears that flowed from her eyes, reminding
her that it wasn't the first time they would be parting for months. He shoved a strand of hair that fell on her
face and stared longingly into her eyes. She reached to kiss him. They did kiss,
hands roamed and clothes went off. Before they could both find their lost
guards, they were unclad, wrapped in each other's arms, riding each other to
cloud nine.
Four months went by and school resumed. Uluoma couldn't wait to see her
'bestie' again, although their friendship had taken another turn. The day she went visiting with their drink of
celebration, 33 Export Lager beer, she rushed in unannounced as she was wont to
and not only did she see David, she also discovered something she never know
about him.
David was kneeling on the floor, grasping the window bars tightly as another
man kept thrusting his rear. She couldn't believe it. Her David certainly
couldn't be gay without her knowing it but there he was groaning in pleasure to
every of his partner's thrust. They were oblivious of her presence, thanks to
the music blaring from the sound system and the ineffable pleasure derived. It
was when David began to jerk intermittently as he approached his climax that
she let go of the bag that contained four bottles of the 33 Export Lager Beer
she came with. She was shattered like the bottles of 33 Export Lager Beer.
The gay lovers stopped and looked at her direction for the first time with
awe-struck faces. She didn't let the guilt in David's eyes stop her. She just stormed
out tear eyed.
"I did confront him. I asked him why he cheated with a man and not a lady."
"Cheated?" Nina's sarcasm
was ostensible. "You were just
friends with benefits. Anyways, what was his response?"
Uluoma stared into space and as she spoke in huskily. "Lulu, I've always been gay. You were just a shot at
heterosexuality which never was my thing. I just wanted to see if I could be
people's definition of normal but I couldn't.”
Nina was agape.
"Yes, I was just a shot at something
and so could you, if you don't retrace your steps now."
Nina wanted to demur but stopped as Uluoma walked to the fridge and brought out a bottle of her favourite drink.
"33 export lager beer... My comfort,
my solace, my 'bestie'...the only friendship I'll never break even if it goes
shattering on the floor ".
Nina could only shake her head; wondering aloud if her sister had gone psycho.
- Victoria B. Willie
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